Sunday, October 23, 2011

A Catch Up

So the last time that I even attempted to blog was March first... It's been about seven months. If I could only use seven words to tell you about those seven months they would be:
Joey three, Guy two, Elena born, happy.

Thankfully, I have a lot more words... below are all the facebook updates from this spring, summer and fall. More regular post to follow. Really. : )


Joey was very dramatic and sad (as only a 3 yr old can be) when he told me in the car today that he is feeling left out because "you do the laundry and don't tell me..." .....ohhh. ooookay Joey. Sure
Elena is now six months old and crawling, Guy is two years old and talking, Joey is three years old and thinks he runs the world... : )
Joey and Guy fought this morning for at least 20 minutes over whether a toy vehicle that they were playing with was a "car" or a "hiccup truck".
We went to the apple orchard/pumpkin patch today! We told they boys they could each pick out a pumpkin. Joey chose a perfectly round orange one with a stem. Guy insisted upon two large rocks. At least they didn't charge us for the rocks.
 Joey thought I was the meanest mother in the whole world today --when I checked out multiple library books for him but had to refuse his request to try and check out the library trash can. Sometimes I just can't win : )
While I was making their breakfast today the kids wanted to watch the dvd 'Planet Earth' instead of 'Elmo'. I was feeling quite proud of their decision until 15 minutes later when over our toast and oranges I was trying to explain why a coyote would want to take a baby rabbit from it's mommy and eat it...
Went and grilled out last night. We caught Guy not only stuffing his pockets full of acorns but actually chewing them and eating them as well. Joey drew our attention to the situation when he started chasing his brother with a big stick yelling "only squirrels and deer eat those Guy! only squirrels and deer!!" .... needless to say, all mouths were emptied of the choking hazard and most sticks confiscated.
I was talking to the kids about how God is always with them. I told them that when they are happy God is with them, also when they are sad. I told them God never leaves them and then said, "What does God do when you're angry?" (looking for the word 'stay') -- Joey immediately declared, "Eats!" – No Joey- God doesn’t eat when he’s stressed- that’s mom.
Yesterday Joey and Guy were riding their bikes around when Joey suddenly stops and demands money from Guy. Guy dutifully hit Joey's outstretched hand and continued on his way. I didn't understand this game until I realized we drove a total of 30 hours on Toll Roads recently....
 if you see a two year old in Target wearing snow boots in August- throwing a fit because his mother won't let him suck on a bottle of bleach that she has in her cart--- he's mine.
I was playing with Ellie trying to get her to laugh saying things like, "where's your smile? Where is it? Where's your smile?" This- (for no good reason)- greatly annoyed Joey and from across the room he yelled, "IT"S IN HER MOUTH MOM!!"
I was so behind in laundry. Not one family member had one clean shirt. Yesterday I had huge piles of clothes around me that I was trying to separate into wash loads and Joey walked by and saw the display and said excitedly, "oh Mom! You're building castles?!"
I've given up on bibs so on macaroni night I just take off the kid's shirts and pop the boys in the bathtub after dinner. Tonight I was getting their plates ready and told them to take off their shirts. I turned around to hand them their food and saw Guy pantless climbing into his chair... ready to eat!
 Joey just informed me that the moon and sun are afraid of the rain. So whenever it rains, they run and hide. I know that one day I'll have to explain about cloud cover and precipitation but his explanation was much more interesting.
So we have a baby swing... but the baby is never in it. Guy has adopted this swing as his special seat.. he turns on this soft 'underwater' music that the swing plays and curls up even though it is way to small for him. I think I'm going to forget the toddler bed and move him straight from a crib to a personal hammock.
Today I dropped Joey off at VBS at a strange church where he ony knew one other person. There were probably 75 kids there. He was there 2.5 hours. I know that they sang songs, did projects, ate a snack, listened to a story, etc. When I went to pick him up the ONLY detail he could remember and tell me from this whole experience was that he drank a juice box.
 I went to check in on the boys after they went to sleep- only to find Guy curled up squished inside his pillowcase with his pillow. Just his head sticking out. I love Guy. He's so cute and just a little weird. Children are wonderful.
I figure I haven't slept a consecutive five hours in about three years. It's like nighttime is just a different kind of day. I think I should switch to a three hour awake/ three hour asleep 24 hour schedule. Playdate at 3am? snack at midnight? naptime instead of dinnertime? yes.
It turns out Guy is frightened of helium balloons... that's more than enough birthday fun for now 3 year old Joey.
So today I was excited because I beat someone to the last beach umbrella, frustrated because I could not find my coupon for strawberries, I used the phrase, "do I need to call your father...", and then I typed in to google search "How to make a dump truck birthday cake."..... I am so officially a mom I can hardly believe it.
We read a book about two boys and their dump truck fairly often. Like everyday. On the last page there is an illustration of both the brothers in the bathtub talking about the plans for the next day. Today we were reading this book and got to that page and Joey said, "Those boys- they've been in the bath a loooonnnggg time. Many days. When is their dad going to get them out?"
We had a super fun and busy morning but no plans or promises for the afternoon.. As I was putting Joey to sleep for his nap I asked what was his favorite thing we did today. "Swimming" he replied. "Hmmmm" I said, "We didn't go swimming ." Joey smiled... "Not yet....!"
Theology is a little confusing. I told Joey that God was always with us and he ran to the window then raised his hands in a frustrated manner and said, "I don't see his car. Where is Jesus' car?!" Yes Joey. That invisibility aspect can be tricky.
Tonight I asked Joey where Jesus lives, looking for the answer, 'my heart' and instead he says (super confidently)- "OH!! Connecticut!!"
Guy decided his new 'security object' is going to be this large rock. I can barely hold it in one hand. He carries it around in both his hands and won't put it down anywhere. Normally I require that it stay in the car when we go out but this afternoon it wasn't worth the battle and I had three different people in Target ask me if I knew my child was carrying this rock. Yes. I'm aware.
BEACH DAY !!!! And by beach I mean the little man made lake -and venturing no further out then up to my knees because that's Joey's chest height and I'll have Guy eating sand and a baby under the umbrella. And by day I mean 2.5 hours. Because little children get overheated easily. Then cranky. And hungry. And tired... ...... nevertheless... BEACH DAY!!!!!!!!!!
Elena Jane is seven weeks old! It feels like she's been here forever- but it's been the quickest forever that I've ever known.... : )
Every morning when I do pilates on my living room floor Joey normally tries to do the moves with me... but now he has graduated to sitting on the couch and yelling out phrases such as, "Sit taller mommy!" "reach longer!" I'm lucky to have such a cute personal trainer but I think I'm going to start moving my routine to after his bedtime.
Close your eyes. Imagine covering your shirt entirely in peanut butter, jelly and applesauce and then rolling in the sand. Sand is also your shoes, pants, ears, mouth and hair. Eat an ant that happened to be crawling on your arm. Open your eyes. Aren't you glad you aren't 21 months old?
The other day Joey saw a school bus and yelled excitedly, "WHOA! it's SOOOOO big. It's SOOOOOOOO BIG! IT"S HUGE!! Just like you mommy!! " I decided to feel amused rather than insulted. Obviously he's still working on comparing like objects.
Well. Trying to go clothes shopping, (for myself), with an infant, is about as productive as trying to wait in a 20 minute post office line with a two year old. Will I ever be able to function efficiently in society ever again? Probably not for a good five years.
It was naptime and Joey goes to get his little green blanket-- "nightnight"-- he's slept with since birth and then suddenly turns and hands it to me, paused, then said, "I don't need it. I don't need it. I'm a big boy."... my heart hurts a tiny bit.
I checked in on Joey to make sure he was sleeping during naptime only to find him standing on his bed with his head tucked under the blinds looking out the window. I asked him sternly if he was looking at lawnmowers instead of sleeping. "Yes." He said, totally thrilled "They are just so special mom. So special."
Elena Jane Spadino is here!! April 17 2011, 10:55am, 8lbs 15oz!!!
I have a to do list printed off with tasks written such as, 'organize Joey's infant clothes' and 'have professional photos taken of kids', 'go on vacation without children' and 'figure out how to use grocery coupons effectively'. This list is literally titled, "Things to Do Before Joey is Eight." I like to keep life realistic.
Lesson for the day: never ever say, "okay! Fine!! WHATEVER!!" in response to a two year old's inaudible voice from the next room. Always, always, clarify the terms of the question. This is how you can avoid a broken lamp.
There are endless April Fools jokes to play when you're nine months pregnant. Most variations involve a glass of water and labor. Predictable yet still hysterical. to me.
I called the doctor to set up an apt. for Joey and for the life of me could not remember his birthday. Not even the month. Just completely blanked. But of course I kept guessing until she just cut me off and looked up his records based on address. I should probably not hold a conversation with an adult until I get some sleep. So in about 2 years.
Last night I was up with Joey at 9,10,11.30, 12.20-1.00, 1.30, 2.45-3.15 and 4.00 am, because he had a 103 fever and double ear infections. This morning at 6.30, he got another dose of tylenol. I got up for the day and ate a large piece of chocolate cake for breakfast. This might be a day.
The other day Guy was throwing a fit because I apparently wasn't making his lunch quick enough. Joey says to him, "GUY JAMES STOP IT! Mom's 'GOING AS FAST AS SHE CAN.' YOU JUST NEED TO WAIT A MINUTE." Normally I would follow Joey's correction of Guy up with a 'I AM the mom' lecture-but this time I just accepted the parenting help. It was extremely accurate.
Husband Joe spent some time today online researching winter camping gear. Then I spent an hour researching couch slipcovers. Unless a more reasonable compromise can be made I might end up covering my furniture in zero degree sleeping bags, or Joe may be freezing in the wilderness in a 'one piece sure fit cocoa cotton sofa cover'.
So when Joey needs a break from the world, to "regroup his emotions" , or when he is being punished, we have him sit in a central location in our home with his back to a wall. Yesterday Joey and I were looking at a photo of an angel statue leaning against a wall. He asked me what it was and I told him. "Ohhhhh", he said knowingly. "That angel's in timeout."
Yesterday Joey heard the "beep beep beep" of a garbage truck backing up outside. Not being able to place this sound he frantically ran to stand underneath our smoke detector and started waving his arms around. I obviously need to either review "transportation noises" or become a better cook.

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